be happy in the moment. this is your story.

 

I wrote this on Instagram & on my Facebook page today, and thought I’d share it here today too – with a little backstory.

 

 

Life isn’t like it is in movies or glossy magazine photos – nor should it be – it’s not real. Don’t set unrealistic expectations for your hubs & kiddos today.

The day is about you – but it’s about you being grateful for being a mama.

Breakfast in bed isn’t as amazing as snuggling in bed with your husband and kiddos.  Cards, flowers, & presents aren’t necessary – hugs & kisses are.

Don’t forget the simple things & what this day is really about – joy in being a mama.

My Mother’s Day so far – up at 4 am to work before the house wakes up.  Playdough fun at 7 am with my babies while I work (because they didn’t sleep as late as I would have hoped).  Letting Hubs sleep in – yikes did I really just say that?! I did, and I’m really okay with it! You know what – I work my butt off, but Hubs, he works his butt off everyday too, so that I have the ability to stay home, work from home, and enjoy these babies of mine before they get too old where they don’t want mama snuggles anymore.

Hubs and I, we respect each other, are kind to each other, and love each other with a full heart every day.

It’s all about your viewpoint, changing your expectations, being happy with YOUR story (and what a grand one it is!), and changing what is important.  Important as a morning full of flowers, cards, and treats are – those don’t represent motherhood to me – a morning alone with kiddos enjoying their playdough perfection does.

Oh, I’m sure a fabulous breakfast will be made once Hubs wakes up & homemade cards and presents will be given – I have no doubt.  But given the option to choose any day between gifts and cards on just one day, versus love, kindness, and respect all year long – I will always choose the latter.

The backstory…

My very first mother’s day I remember like it was yesterday.  The amount of pressure I must have put on Hubs, I’m sure was unsurpassable – poor guy.

Throughout life there are these unrealistic expectations – expectations of grandeur.

In high school, you are supposed to get balloons & flowers sent to you at school for your birthday from your boyfriend, or from your parents.

In your twenties, birthday celebrations become a whole weekend – a whole month.

When you get engaged, a big event is to be planned – down on one knee – flowers – presents – parties.

When you get married, everything has to be perfect, down to the proper trim on the napkins.

WHY?!

There are all sorts of conspiracy theories out there that companies have created this craziness and these expectations – but we are the ones to feed into this commercialism of what a “perfect moment” is supposed to look like, the peer pressure to “one up” the next person in perfection.

But why?!  Why does it matter?

Marriage isn’t about flowers, cards, presents & the perfect proposal – it’s a nice story and there is nothing wrong with it if this is your story.  But what’s an even better story is creating and nurturing a lasting relationship.  I’m truly not a relationship expert by any means – because like every marriage out there – there have been bad times and a whole lot of freaking amazing times.  But like a garden – it doesn’t grow unless you care for it and nurture it – things I’m working on everyday.

One thing age has brought me is wisdom.

I have not always been this wise – that first Mother’s Day was a disaster and a half – there were tears – I remember yelling at Hubs asking him why he didn’t love me as much as every other Hubs out there that treated their wives to pedicures & breakfast in bed for a perfect first Mother’s Day.  My dad never bought my mom these ridiculous things (that I know of).  Why did I expect these things – like he was supposed to look up in his “man manual” hmmm first mother’s day – this is what I need to do – check!  Why were these things a measure of his love?!

I had these expectations – unrealistic expectations – only to be horribly upset once Hubs did not meet these expectations.  Expectations that were in my head that society Facebook statuses told me I must have.  It didn’t matter that he loved me with all his heart – I decided that it wasn’t enough – I so badly wanted the exact same thing as everyone else – why?!   Because of peer pressure, because of everyone else’s highlight reel?!  I don’t know?!

My dad used to always say “if everyone wanted to jump off a bridge would you want to jump off a bridge too?!  ha-ha I’m sure your parents said that too.

Well deep down it didn’t matter – it only mattered when the eye of comparison reeled its head.

What did & does matter is that he was & is my rock – my knight in shining armor, my lobster.

And what also mattered was me & changing my view.

My view is pretty darn awesome I have to say – I’m glad I opened my eyes to see the amazing-ness right in front of me!  It is with patience, clarity, and peace that I can say those things on Instagram & Facebook with conviction.  And it is with pride that Hubs came downstairs this morning with relief in his eyes.  He looked me in the eyes – saw no sign of upsetness in my eyes – said “Happy Mother’s Day” (and the kiddos chimed in too) – I then gave him a huge hug & some kisses.  It brought me amazing joy that by my actions alone, I set the tone for the entire day – for an amazing Mother’s Day – because I was content, happy, and at peace – at peace with my story.

So, all there is left to say, for now, is that the only way to fight back and to reclaim your story, is to be at peace with you.  Be at peace with your story.  Be at peace with your happiness.

Happy Mother’s Day – love you to pieces!

♥

Oh & before I forget (speaking of being a stressed out new mother ;) – I’ve got ya covered!!)

Today marks the start of an INCREDIBLE huge series called Baby’s First Year that will include resources, advice, stories, quotes, guides – and a HUGE Giveaway below! You’ll want to tune in for 12 great days of content all about babies and their caretakers! You can follow along with all the posts in this series at Lemon Lime Adventures or on the Pinterest board.

And, an AWESOME SAUCE giveaway featuring over $2000 worth of mama-approved goodies!!!!

It would totally rock for a Mama Miss Reader to win some of these goodies!!!

To enter, just use the Rafflecopter form below.

Here are all the fab bloggy mama’s kicking off the series today.

And, stay tuned for Thursday here at Mama Miss, because I’ve been working on something SUPER SPECIAL.  I won’t say what it is, but I’ll give you a hint…  Baby Book ;)  Designed by me!!  So, if you like my current planners – you’ll love this one!!!

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• Celebrating Motherhood | Real Stories from Real Moms ~ Lemon Lime Adventures
• Sweet tooth: from mother to children ~ La Cité des Vents
• Happy Mother’s Day {Free Printable} ~ Bare Feet on the Dashboard
• The Day I Became a Mom ~ The Jenny Evolution
• Being a Mom of Growing Readers  ~ Growing Book by Book
• How We Ordered a Baby ~ Let the Journey Begin
• I Always Said I’m Not A Baby Person ~ Pink Oatmeal
• Celebrate Motherhood: They Call Me Momma ~ The Stay-at-Home-Mom Survival Guide
• Mom to Three: Two Here, One in My Heart ~ Still Playing School
• Time After Time ~ True Aim Education
• A Hand Made Family ~ Hand Made Kids Art
• Four generations ~ Wildflower Ramblings
• Ten Things I Learned From Motherhood ~ Conceiving Piper
• 3 Poems Celebrating Motherhood ~ BPhotoArt
• #ItWasMom ~ Trust Me, I’m a Mom
• 5 things to love about multiples ~ Bambini Travel
• A Letter To Myself (As a New Mom) ~ Peace but Not Quiet
• Celebrating Mothers Day from the Couch ~ ALLterNATIVElearning
• Happy Mother’s Day from a First Time Mom ~ The Realistic Mama
• I’m Not Super Mom, Just Mom to 3 Super Little Boys ~ Makeovers & Motherhood
• Becoming Mama ~ It’s A Long Story
• Celebrating Grandmotherhood, the World’s Best Job ~ Living Montessori Now
• Simply Mom ~ Plain Vanilla Mom
• The Ultimate Baby Series and Giveaway ~ Natural Beach Living

 

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